Preparation

Preparations continue for my entry into the sordid world of the homeless. The focus is on motorhomeless autonomy. Recent purchases include disposable cleaning wipes, a small stainless steel water bottle, and a pair of gym shorts (for use as pajamas).

Typical Autonomous Hottie

Once the homeless motorhome (read: minivan) is procured, a sleeping bag, foam yoga mat, and a small pillow will be purchased. Other homeless accessories have been previously purchased. Also, a large plastic cookie jar has already been salvaged for use as a portable urinal.

Typical Worldly Hottie

Unlike other homeless guys, I will not be renting a storage unit. All of my worldly possessions will remain in the minivan. The small plastic schoolboy box that holds all of my important documents (and spare minivan keys) will be stored at moms' place.

Silence, Little Lamb!

All consumables are being depleted, unless any of the latter can augment the homeless lifestyle. My rechargeable electric shaver will be cleaned and donated to charity. The air flosser will either be disposed of or stored after cleaning. The cheap $50 "smartphone" will be decommissioned and disposed of.

Typical Summer Hottie

All of the aforementioned must be completed within a few days. Bring on the hotties of Summer already! Homelessness is such a "downer." Only pictures of young hotties can restore the festive mood.