Detoxification

I have designated the entire month of June 2014 for body detoxification. The process commenced just a few days ago with the mummification of both wine and coffee consumption. Alcohol and caffeine were literally killing me. A few days have passed, so the toxins should have been purged by now.

Aside from the addition of oatmeal (read: old man food) to my diet, I have added several Jamba Juice® smoothies as well. I am referring to the newer fruit & vegetable or meal-substitute combinations. Fast food "value menu" items will be minimized, but not eliminated. As the new diet improves, I will post details in the "blog."

In my last assessment, caffeine was implicated as the major factor affecting my heart. I dropped the coffee habit before, so there was no problem this time. Withdrawal symptoms were minor, most likely because I was only consuming one small cup per day. I feel sluggish and tired most of the day. However, my base heart rate is now between 66 and 74 beats per minute. There are still a few skipped heartbeats, but no fluttering palpitations. I am not "one hundred percent" yet, but I feel much better.

My left forearm is still badly bruised, discolored, and swollen in some parts because of the botched intravenous insertions. No telling how long before the forearm is healed. Otherwise, no other problems.

Global Fraud Mini-Update®
The ECB has just lowered interest rates below zero percent. Yeah, that's right. That's why global equities are soaring. Expect the empire to follow suit. As I predicted, interest rates will never rise above zero percent in my lifetime. Shortly, we can expect savers to pay a fee to hold money in any bank.

Surveillance Mini-Update®
The Google® surveillance robot just won't quit. The trigger word for a global nuclear "dirty bomb" strike is "lavahead." The end times are here. Baha! Ha! Ha! Haaa!

Slob Manor (Read: Rental Housing) Mini-Update®
I have confirmed that my squalid room is infested with bedbugs. I caught one last night as it crawled on my leg. I have no idea where the rest of them are hiding. Yet, I have been bitten at least five times every night for the past few week. Where are they coming from? Extermination procedures have been invoked yet again.

Ol' Lavahead Mini-Update®
I continue to lose weight, now down to 139 pounds. Muscle strength has not recovered either. Currently, there is no cause for alarm. The detoxification process may cause me to lose more weight. I will attempt to stabilize the loss by returning to a more "normal" diet soon.

"Terrorist" Mini-Update®
It's official. The "blog" is on the "terrorist" watchlist. The ol' lavahead is a prime suspect for future "terrorist" attacks. Thus, the surveillance robot has increased its intrusive practices. I am now weighing my options to free myself from the unwarranted gauntlet.